


Shattered Soul

by thehoneybeecastielfollows



Series: Shattered Soul [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Castiel/Dean Winchester Angst, Castiel/Dean Winchester Fluff, Castiel/Dean Winchester Smut, Destiel Angst, Destiel Fluff, Fluff, M/M, Smut, destiel smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-09-05 07:28:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16806157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thehoneybeecastielfollows/pseuds/thehoneybeecastielfollows
Summary: Dean invites Castiel to live in the bunker, even though Ezekiel, who is currently possessing Sam, told Dean that Castiel couldn’t stay because it would be too dangerous for him. But Dean doesn’t care because Castiel is his best friend and he needs Dean. Castiel is human and he has nowhere else to go, therefore Dean needs to be there to help him through it all. Will, Ezekiel leave Sam because of the danger, or will he stay in Sam and heal him while taking admonition?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This series will be full of Destiel feels. This series is based before the Winchesters know that Ezekiel is actually Gadreel. Enjoy!

Cas handed the customer her bag of snacks she had just purchased with a small smile on his face. “Good day ma'am. And good luck.” He gave her a thumbs up and a smile as she grabbed the bag from his hand.

She smiled awkwardly and nodded, probably thinking about how insane he sounded. She left the small gas station called gas-n-sip, leaving Cas to put the money she had given him in the cash register.

He had been working at gas-n-sip for a while, using the job as a way to make enough money to survive. He didn’t own an apartment or any form of a house, but he had his ways of enduring. He had lived in a few homeless camps, just to get by, but he was at the point where he didn’t have anywhere else to go. Dean told him that he couldn’t stay in the bunker anymore, so he had been living in the supply closet in the gas station. It was his only way of withstanding the loss of his grace and becoming human.

“Steve?” Nora, his co-worker, asked, a small smile forming on her face.

Cas was using the name ‘Steve’ as an alias because the angels were seeking revenge on him for the fall, so he figured using an alias would keep him mostly hidden from the angry angels.

“Yes?” Cas looked up from the cash register, offering Nora a smile, which had been quite uncommon as of that time in his life. Sure, it was uncommon when he was an angel, but it was even rarer now that he was human.

“Could you re-stock the candy aisle?” She asked kindly, seemingly busy with the task at hand.

Cas nodded and walked around the counter, heading towards the supply closet. He entered the semi-large supply closet and grabbed the extra stock of candy that had been stored there. He headed back with the box of candy in his arms and walked over to the candy aisle. Nora was right. It wasn't fully stocked like it should’ve been. He began to stock the ostensibly empty aisle with a small smile forming on his face. 

He was happy with his life, finally. He wasn’t dreading life or work, and he wasn't blaming everything on himself. Sure, he felt that he had been a terrible angel, doing everything wrong and hurting people, but he didn’t have to worry about that any longer because he wasn’t an angel anymore. His life was better than it was before, and he didn’t need to do anything to change that. Or so he thought.

When the candy aisle was fully stocked, he had a few extra brands that weren't needed, so he headed back into the supply closet to put the box away. He came back out, only to see a familiar face smiling softly at him. His eyes widened and his mouth was agape.

“Dean?” He asked, barely believing it himself. Dean had kicked him out of the bunker for no apparent reason, so why was he here now? “What are you doing here?” He asked monotonously, sounding as if he didn’t want Dean to be there.

“Gee it’s nice to see you too, Cas,” Dean stated, unsure of what else to say.

“It’s Steve now.” He said, gesturing towards his nametag. “And you… You – You surprised me.” Cas explained, regaining the slightly shy side of his personality.

“Well, the feeling is mutual,” Dean stated, trying to make the situation less awkward and uncomfortable. “This is some coverup.” Dean teased and Cas slightly rolled his eyes, looking away from Dean. 

Cas went on to explaining everything that happened to him and why he needed a better place to hide. He told him what he did at his job and how he had been living. Everything from living to loving.

Dean was disappointed in himself after Cas told him everything. He was the one who kicked him out of the bunker because Ezekial told him to. He was the one who told him that he couldn’t stay. He didn’t even have a valid explanation for it. He only did it because Ezekial told him to because the angels would find them faster if Cas stayed, and Dean needed Ezekial to save Sam. So, he told Cas to leave, just to be safe.

“Ca– Steve?” Dean asked, feeling the nerves build up. He wasn’t sure if this was the right thing to do, but he was going to do it anyway. 

Cas looked up, internally asking him what he needed.

Dean looked down, fidgeting with his hands nervously. “I know I told you that you couldn’t stay at the bunker, but, uh…” He paused, unsure of how to say it. “You can stay in the bunker. I mean, if you want to.” Truth be told, he missed Cas. He thought that if he could convince Cas to stay in the bunker, he would feel better and Cas would too.

Cas smiled and nodded slowly, grateful for the offer. He had nowhere else to go, and he would enjoy it if he could live in the bunker.

“You can still work here if you want. I’m sure you would because you have… Friends here.” Dean said, gesturing to Nora and the customers.

“Yes, thank you, Dean," Cas said, the corner of his mouth lifting in a small smile.

Dean nodded and chuckled nervously. He was happy that his best friend was going to live in the bunker, he was just slightly nervous that Cas would say no because Dean had kicked him out before. He thought that Cas hated him because of that. But he didn’t. 

"You comin’?” Dean asked, his crow’s feet clearly showing from the smile that had taken over his entire face.

Cas sighed softly, uncertain of how it would turn out. “Alright, my shift’s over in five minutes.”

Dean nodded and told Cas to meet him in the car. He was finally becoming reunited with his best friend. Maybe he could help Cas with being human and he could teach him how to survive. He could become a hunter in training once again, in just a matter of time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 2! Enjoy!

Dean leaned against the side of Baby, patiently waiting for Cas to walk out of the transparent doors. He was glad that he could bring Cas back to the bunker with him, but his anxiety kicked up slightly every time he thought about what Ezekiel’s reaction would be, to Cas walking through the metal doors.

His thoughts were soon shoved away as Cas walked towards him, a small amount of determination in his stride. Dean smiled softly as he watched Cas approach him. Sometimes Cas walked intimidatingly, and sometimes he walked with bitter strides, but this time he had pep in his stride. Dean wasn’t sure if he had caused it, or if Cas was just having a pleasant day.

Cas smiled as he walked up to Dean, happy that he had decided to let him stay in the bunker. Cas wasn't sure what was making him radiate. It could have been Dean, and his thoughtful invitation to Cas, or maybe it was the thought of living somewhere near Dean once again. It couldn’t have been the thought of Dean, could it?

The sound of Dean’s voice startled Cas out of his thoughts. “We’re gonna hit that diner on our way back to the bunker. I want some pie.”

Cas looked up and nodded softly, acknowledging that Dean didn’t mean that they would literally hit it. “I have enjoyed the taste of pie as well.”

Dean smiled and let out a breathy laugh. Cas was human and he liked pie! That made it so much more meaningful to Dean. Truth be told, Dean didn't just want pie. He wanted to spend the day with Cas. Just him and Cas. That was the only explanation for it. It wasn’t something more, it couldn’t have been. Dean was straight. He was the straightest man alive. He didn’t like other men. Unless, no. It was impossible. Dean couldn’t like Cas like that. Cas was his best friend. He never planned on Cas becoming his lover. But it could happen, Cas could be Dean’s lover. If Cas liked him back, but that was impossible.

Little did he know, Cas was having the same conversation with his own conscious. Cas was thinking about how the feelings that he had been experiencing were strange. He didn’t know what it meant. Sure, he had always noticed that he shared a more profound bond with Dean than Sam, but it wasn’t love, was it? Dean was just the person that Cas would always stick with, through thick and thin, no matter what.

They both snapped out of their trances and looked at the asphalt, flustered from their thoughts. Dean chuckled nervously, tried to shove his thoughts to the back of his mind.

“Let’s hit the road than.” He said as he opened the door to sit in the driver’s seat. 

Cas walked around to the other side of the car and got in the passenger’s seat. He faced turned red when he realized something. “Uh, Dean?”

Dean was about to put the key in the ignition, but he looked up hearing an apprehensive Cas. “Yeah?”

“I, uh, I need to urinate.” Cas looked away, certainly ashamed of what he had to tell Dean.

“Oh, okay… Yeah, go ahead.” Dean looked away awkwardly as Cas stepped out of the car to head back into the building of gas-n-sip. Sometimes Dean forgot that Cas was human, so it surprised him when Cas asked for a leftover burrito or to use the restroom. To Dean, Cas was taking this ‘human’ thing pretty well. Dean thought that Cas would’ve been heartbroken from the loss of his grace, and he might’ve been, but he was hiding it well, and Dean admired him for that. He was doing well considering the condition he was in.

Cas walked out of the gas station a few minutes later and Dean smiled as Cas got back into the passenger’s seat of his car. Dean put the key in the ignition and the engine turned over, making a beautiful roar. Dean stepped on the gas and headed to the diner.

-

Dean and Cas took a seat in a booth that was near the back of the diner, and a waitress, who was clearly trying to flirt with Dean, walked over.

“What can I get for ya?” She asked in a cheery tone, biting her lip and giggling softly.

Dean rolled his eyes, obviously not feeling it, and sighed. “Bacon cheeseburger with fries and pie!” He exclaimed, becoming overly excited for a meal. He looked at Cas, internally telling him that it was his turn to order.

“Uhm, just a cheeseburger with fries and pie,” Cas stated shyly, earning a grin from Dean.

“What kind of pie?” She asked in a higher pitched tone than her usual voice.

“Cherry.” They both said in unison, causing the waitress to smile and giggle.

“Alright.” She walked away, swaying her hips to show off to the many men that were in the diner.

Dean sighed and leaned back, grateful that she was gone. Cas noticed this and smiled softly.

“I take it you don’t like her that much” Cas observed, slightly glad that Dean wasn’t trying to hit on any girl within a ten-mile radius. He didn’t want to experience the unpleasant feeling of jealousy. He mentally smacked himself, trying to stop himself from thinking about these things.

“No, she makes me…” He paused, trying to think of the right word. “Uncomfortable.”

Cas nodded, sort of understanding what he meant. “May I ask why?” He wasn’t trying to shove an answer out of Dean, he just wanted to know why he didn’t want the waitress to flirt with him. That was unusual for Dean.

“I have… someone else on my mind,” Dean stated, not wanting it to be too obvious that he was talking about Cas. He had finally allied with himself in knowing that he did, indeed, have a crush on Cas.

Cas’ heart shattered. He knew it wasn’t him. It couldn’t be him. Dean didn’t like men, even if Cas didn’t technically count as a man, his vessel was a man. Cas looked down at his hands in his lap, trying to hide the fact that he was heartbroken.

Dean noticed that Cas became upset and he immediately felt bad, but he didn’t want to tell him just yet. He took a deep breath and prepared to tell Cas everything. He couldn’t stand seeing Cas upset because he was too chicken to tell Cas about his feelings for him.

“I see,” Cas said quietly, feeling the waterworks build up.

Dean looked at him with regret consuming his facial features. “No, no, no. That’s not what I meant, Cas.”

Cas looked up in confusion, his brows knitting together and his head tilting to the side. “What?” He asked, visibly confused as to what Dean meant.

“It’s you Cas.”

Cas’ head tilted to the side farther. He was imagining things. Dean couldn’t have been saying this to him. It wasn’t real. 

“You’re the one on my mind.” Dean restated, his stomach feeling like there were a hundred butterflies flying around and fluttering their wings against his stomach.

Realization smacked Cas in the face, causing his eyes to widen and his jaw to essentially drop to the floor. “W-what?”

“I like you, Cas,” Dean said with a smile.

Right as he said that the waitress came over with their food, and upon hearing what Dean had said, her eyes widened and she attempted to look more happy than shocked. “Congratulations? I guess.” She smiled warmly, realizing that she could no longer trifle with Dean.

Dean laughed ineptly and nodded. “Thanks.”

Cas was too shocked to say anything. The butterflies in his stomach were too distracting and, in some ways, he felt the urge to vomit, but he wasn’t going to.

Once the waitress left, Cas gained some of his courage and smiled sloppily. “ I like you too, Dean.”

Dean grinned and licked his lips, causing Cas to shiver from how weak he was becoming. Cas saw Dean’s eyes flash to his lips and Cas nodded, telling him that it was okay. Dean leaned forward and pressed his lips to Cas’ causing electricity to flow through his body. He knew that people were staring but he didn’t care because he was finally showing affection towards the ex-angel he liked–no loved.

They pulled away, both out of breath and flustered, and looked into each other’s eyes. Dean was glad that he didn’t have to hide his desire towards Cas, and Cas was glad that he finally knew what his feelings meant.

They both looked down and remembered that they still needed to eat. Dean chuckled softly and Cas smiled, watching Dean contently. 

They shared stories while eating, enjoying each other’s company without having to hide their feelings. At that moment they knew that everything would be okay because they had each other and that’s all that mattered.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 3! Enjoy!

As soon as Dean and Cas finished eating they got in the car and started the short trip to the bunker since Cas’ job was local. Halfway there, Cas looked over at Dean with a worried expression on his face. Dean noticed the movement in his peripheral vision, and he looked over, wondering what was wrong. 

“What is it?” Dean asked, worried about his newly discovered boyfriend. Even though they hadn’t specifically talked about being together, he still considered Cas his boyfriend.

“What is Sam gonna think? About us.” Cas was nervous about Sam’s reaction to them being a couple. He was new to this whole thing, and he didn't want Sam to disapprove of their relationship.

“I don’t know, but I’m not gonna let his words separate us. Besides, I’m the oldest so he has to do what I say, not vice-versa.” Dean said, a small smile replacing the frown caused by the thoughts of Sam dividing them.

Cas nodded, relief flowing through him at the feeling of knowing that Dean had it under control. “Okay.” He said quietly, fixing his gaze on the scenery outside. It was calming to him in a way. The way the Impala drove past the trees that were as green as Dean’s eyes. There was a sense of peace in his body. A feeling that told him that everything would turn out fine.

-

Once in the bunker’s garage, Dean and Cas stepped out of Baby and grabbed the duffle bag out of the trunk that Dean had brought with him just in case. They both headed inside, Cas looking like he was about to have a mental breakdown, and strolled into the library. Sam was sitting at the first table with his laptop placed in front of him. Nothing new. He looked up at Dean and smiled softly at Cas.

“Hey, Cas. What are you doing here?” He asked, confused as to why Cas was there since Dean had told him that Cas needed to go somewhere else, for some odd reason.

“Dean told me I could stay here,” Cas explained causing Sam’s smile to widen.

Dean looked at Cas softly and handed him his duffle bag, gesturing for Cas to go to his room. “Go unpack and we’ll wait for ya here.”

Cas nodded and accepted the duffle bag, knowing that Dean was just using it as an excuse so that they didn’t have to tell Sam about their relationship yet. He headed to his bedroom and left Sam and Dean to talk alone.

Dean looked at Sam, whose eyes flashed a bright blue, indicating that Ezekiel had taken over Sam’s body for a brief moment. Dean sighed and glanced at the floor, hoping for the best. He flicked his eyes up to him and saw a slightly angered expression forming on Sam’s face.

“What did I tell you?” Ezekiel asked softly, not sounding angered but sounding disappointed.

“I know, I know, but Cas is… He’s my best friend. I’m not letting him sleep in the freaking supply closet of the gas station!” Dean yelled, clearly irritated.

“I’m sensing something more…” Ezekiel stated with a small smirk that was barely noticeable.

Dean’s face turned bright red and he looked down at his feet. “Freakin’ angels.” He said quietly.

“Am I mistaken?” Ezekiel asked, his eyebrows furrowing slightly. He wasn’t sure what he was sensing, but he knew that Dean was being completely truthful.

“No, I mean, I…” He sighed, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to get out of it. “Cas is my boyfriend, and I’m not leaving him in the shadows to die. He’s staying here. I don’t care what you say.” Dean was done with everyone trying to separate him from the people he loved.

Ezekiel nodded, attempting to understand that dean was, in fact, in love with his brother, Castiel. “If he stays, there is a higher chance of me being in danger, and I might have to vacate your brother. I just want you to be aware of what may happen and the result of it.”

Dean nodded, fully aware of the possibilities, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to be with Cas. 

Sam’s eyes flashed bright blue once again, and Sam was back. “So, Cas is staying?” Sam continued as if nothing happened since he didn’t know about Ezekiel’s visit and his departure. 

Dean nodded, trying to remember what they were talking about beforehand. “Yep. He’s staying.”

Just at that moment, Cas walked in wearing a different outfit and slightly damp hair, signifying that he had just showered. Dean smiled at the sight of his now clean boyfriend, but that thought reminded him of what he needed to tell Sam. He offered Cas a reassuring smile before fixing his gaze on Sam. 

“We have news.” He said, a small smile replacing his frown in an effort to calm his nerves.

Sam nodded, prepared for bad news or good news, whatever it was that Dean wanted to tell him. “What is it?" 

"Cas and I… I’m… Cas is…” Dean had a difficult time spitting the words out of his mouth. It was a lot harder telling Sam than he thought it would be. “We’re… together.” He finally said, struggling to find the right words.

Sam’s eyebrows rose before his smile widened, his eyes sparkling with joy for once in, what seemed like, forever. “Finally.” He chuckled softly, still smiling widely.

Dean expression changed to a horrified look. “What?”

“It’s so obvious you like each other. I mean, I was just waiting for someone to make a move.” Sam smiled and patted Dean’s shoulder comfortingly.

“O-oh.” Dean looked at Cas, slightly embarrassed that everyone knew before they did.

Cas smiled and walked closer to Dean. He kissed his cheek causing Dean to smile and blush. “It’s alright because now we know,” Cas said happily.

Dean nodded and kissed him back ever so slightly. “I love you, Cas.”

Cas smiled widely, having heard Dean confess his love for him for the first time. He felt, for the first time since he was human, that he could actually be happy, because of Dean. “I love you too.” He said pressing his lips firmly to Dean’s, embracing in the fact that Dean loved him back. He pulled away and rested his forehead on Dean’s, grateful that he had someone with him to help him through the pain and suffering that he knew wouldn’t last long because of the one person who loved him back. Everything was going to be okay.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 4! This one has smut! Not for minors to read, please! Enjoy!

Cas woke up and rolled over, hoping that Dean would be next to him, but the only thing that was there was a crumpled pile of cold sheets. He sighed and sat up, wondering where Dean had gone, but his curiosity was soon replaced with hunger when the smell of bacon sifted through the air. He smiled and swung his legs off the bed, standing up carefully since his body was still slightly sore from sleeping on the cement flooring of the supply closet. He headed in the direction of the smell and smiled when he walked into the kitchen. Dean was standing over the stove cooking bacon while humming Metallica. He walked behind him and wrapped his arms around Dean’s torso, resting his head on his right shoulder. Dean flinched but smiled when he realized it was just Cas.

“Morning Cas,” Dean said, keeping his eyes on the sizzling bacon in the frying pan. He smiled from the contact, wanting to turn around and squeeze the life out of Cas, but he stayed where he was, not wanting the bacon to burn.

“Good morning,” Cas mumbled into Dean’s shoulder, the vibrations causing Dean to chuckle.

“Are you hungry, baby?” Dean asked, the nickname slipping out of his mouth unintentionally.

Cas smiled and nodded eagerly, the smell of the greasy breakfast causing excitement.

Dean put the bacon on a plate and handed it to Cas, not without taking a few pieces for himself. They both ate their breakfast happily, a few words exchanged between one another but not too much conversing since they were both starving. Once they finished eating, they both headed back to their shared bedroom and dressed for the day.

“We’re gonna meet Sam at a diner later. He said he had something to tell us and he just finished a hunt.” Dean explained and Cas nodded.

“Do you think it’s about us?” Cas asked, hoping that if it was about them, that it was good and not bad. 

Dean shrugged, not worried about it. “I already said that nothing can separate us. I don’t care what Sam says. Besides, he seemed happy about us being together.”

Cas nodded, feeling confident about it. “Okay.”

They sat on the bed in each other’s arms and watched Netflix until they had to meet Sam at the diner.

-

Dean walked through the doors of the diner first, making sure the door didn’t hit Cas as he walked through. He held the door for Cas behind him and Cas slowly walked into the diner, scanning the area for Sam. Dean spotted him and walked in his direction, sitting in the seat across from him, Cas sat beside Dean and put his hands in his lap, still shy about coming out to Sam about him and Dean.

Dean spoke up first, noticing Cas’ insecurity. “Hiya Sammy.” He said, a small smile forming on his face.

“Hey Dean, Cas.” Sam paused, giving Cas a reassuring smile. “So get this. There are moments when I notice that I miss long periods of time, or sometimes when we’re in the car and we’re fifty miles away from a town, but a minute later we’re twenty miles away from that town. It just doesn’t make sense.” Sam explained, fixing his gaze on Dean.

Dean had a slight panic attack, but he remained calm because it was the only way to get out of the situation. “I don’t know, Sam. Must be a side effect of the trials or something.” Dean lied, in hopes that Sam, and even Cas, would buy it.

Sam nodded hesitantly, still unsure about it. But, he trusted his brother, therefore he believed it. The trials were difficult for Sam, and some of them had absurd side effects so that’s probably what it was. He looked at Cas who shrugged softly and nodded again, attempting to shove the information into his thick skull.

They all ordered lunch and talked amongst themselves about random topics. It was just small talk while they waited for their food to arrive.

Dean was talking about something random when all of a sudden his hand was placed on Cas’ thigh. Cas gasped quietly, confusedly looking at Dean’s hand, but shook his thoughts away thinking that it was probably just an accident. But, Dean’s palm never left Cas’ thigh. It kept inching higher and higher until it reached his belt buckle. It slid over slightly, about to caress the growing bulge in Cas’ pants but Cas put his hand over Dean’s and looked at him to warn him. But, Dean wasn’t paying any attention to Cas. He was concentrated on Sam as he spoke to him. Cas took a deep breath and squeezed Dean’s hand.

“I, uh, I’m not feeling well. I’m gonna go.” Cas said softly as he stood up from his chair and grabbed Dean’s hand, practically dragging Dean away from the table. “It was nice talking with you, Sam.” Cas walked out of the diner and into Dean’s car as Dean walked around to the driver’s seat. Once Dean got in, Cas looked at him and said one word. “Drive.”

Dean complied and started the car, driving towards the bunker.

-

Cas spotted a place on the side of the road for a car to pull off and he smirked to himself. “Dean. Pull over.”

Dean furrowed his eyebrows but pulled over anyway. Cas got out of the car and opened the door to the back seat, situating himself inside. Dean turned around with a confused expression on his face.

“Come here,” Cas said and Dean didn’t hesitate to get out of the front seat and get into the back. 

Cas didn’t say anything else. Instead, he started pulling Dean’s clothes off one by one. He started with Dean’s jacket, then his shirt, his shoes, his pants, and last but not least, his boxers. Once Dean was left in nothing, Cas took his pants, his shoes, and his boxers off, while Dean pulled his shirt over his head.

“What do you want?” Cas asked, his dominance showing through.

“You,” Dean said and Cas shook his head.

“What do you want?” Cas repeated and Dean groaned. 

“I want you to fuck me so hard. I want you to make me scream your name.” Dean said and Cas smirked.

“As you wish.” Cas put his fingers near Dean’s mouth, his blue eyes full of lust. “Suck,” Cas said and Dean did exactly what he was told. Once Cas was satisfied, he shoved two wet fingers into Dean’s hole, causing him to moan. Cas thrust his fingers in and out of Deans hole getting him ready for his size. 

As soon as Dean was stretched out, Cas positioned himself in front of Dean and slowly pushed in. Dean moaned loudly causing Cas to moan as well as he thrust into Dean agonizingly slow.

“Faster, Cas. Please.” Dean begged and Cas complied.

Cas thrust into Dean harder and faster, causing the entire car to rock with his thrusts. “You’re so tight,” Cas said, leaning down to press his lips to Dean’s, causing Dean’s moans to muffle from his mouth. Cas thrust into Dean even harder causing dean to practically scream.

“Cas!” He yelled, his orgasm getting closer and closer every thrust. “Oh fuck!”

Cas grabbed Dean’s length and started stroking with his palm. Dean’s moans progressed and he lifted his hands to Cas’ back scratching and digging his nails into his back causing Cas to moan loudly.

“Fuck, I’m close,” Dean said, out of breath and whining from the pleasure.

“Me too,” Cas said, his voice gruffer than normal from his orgasm nearing.

Cas began thrusting as hard as he could causing a neverending moan to erupt from Dean. After a few thrusts, Cas had Dean cumming as he screamed his name.

“Castiel!” He screamed, his vision going white from the intense orgasm.

Cas came as well moaning loudly as they both rode out their highs. Once they both calmed down, Cas pulled out and laid beside Dean, both of them breathing heavily. Cas placed his jacket over the both of them and sighed contently.

“That was…” Dean didn’t know what to say.

“Wonderful,” Cas said and Dean nodded.

“I love you, Cas.”

Cas smiled. “I love you too, Dean.” He paused. “Next time you’re gonna call me Daddy.”

Dean chuckled. “Alright.” They fell asleep in each other’s arms, enjoying each other’s warmth.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready for some Destiel feels! Enjoy!

Waking up to Dean’s ringtone essentially shaking the entire car, Cas and Dean groaned and slowly sat up, still sitting on top of each other. Realizing that they were both naked, they slowly started to remember the events of the night before. Cas practically ripping Dean’s clothes off as he took the dominant part of their relationship for once, and Dean begging for more. Cas smiled but grabbed Dean’s phone, the frantic vibrations and loud rock song causing him to want to bash his head into a wall. He handed the phone to Dean who took it reluctantly.

“Sam? What the hell, it’s, like, six in the friggin’ morning!” Dean scolded, his voice still groggy from sleep.

“Ten, actually. Anyway, I was wondering what happened to Cas yesterday,” Sam explained, slightly worried about Cas.

Dean chuckled softly, remembering how Cas had flipped out over Dean touching his thigh the day before. “I, uh, I was touching his thigh and he got a boner.” Dean laughed as he eyed Cas who shot him the bitch face.

Sam didn't know what to say. “What did you do about it?” Sam asked, silently smirking but also curious.

“He fucked me in baby,” Dean said, not even ashamed about it.

“He fucked you?” Sam paused. “I thought it would be the other way.”

“Yeah, me too, but damn is he the dominant one.” Dean smiled at Cas who was looking at his hands, clearly embarrassed. “Don’t be embarrassed, baby. It was really hot.”

Cas smiled and looked out the window to let Dean finish his conversation with Sam.

“Well, where are you?” Sam asked, still smirking from the news he received.

“On the side of the road. Uhm…” He paused looking for a street sign or something that would tell him where he was. “Just outside Lebanon.”

“Alright well I’m at the bunker so just come here I guess,” Sam said, glad that Dean had finally opened up to Cas. 

“Alright.” Dean hung up and looked at Cas who was still looking out the window of the car. “Baby?”

Cas looked over at Dean, a questioning look on his face. Before he could say anything, Dean continued.

“I love you.”

Cas smiled and placed his head on Dean’s bare shoulder. “I love you too.”

“Sam told us to go back to the bunker so put some clothes on and we’ll go to the bunker,” Dean explained as he pulled his shirt over his head.

Cas nodded and put his clothes back on, stepping out of the backseat of the car to get back into the passenger seat. He sat down right as Dean opened the door to the driver’s seat. Dean got in and put the key in the ignition to start the engine. He stepped on the gas and the Impala roared down the highway.

-

Pulling into the bunker’s garage, Dean sighed, wanting to just lay in bed with Cas and cuddle all day. He parked the Impala and stepped out, noticing how sore he was from the night before. He groaned quietly but Cas heard him and shot him a worried look.

“Holy shit, Cas. What did you do to me?” Dean asked, staggering to the trunk of the Impala.

Cas smiled and walked over to Dean, helping him carry his duffle bag. “I apologize, Dean. I only did what I needed to do.”

Dean chuckled and looked at Cas with a ‘seriously?’ facial expression. “Yeah, I can see that.” Dean smiled and closed the trunk, making his way into the bunker.

They both walked over to Sam, who was in the library and greeted him.

“How was the hunt?” Dean asked as he reached over to Cas and grabbed his hand, lacing their fingers together.

“Fine, it was just an easy salt and burn,” Sam said and Dean nodded.

“How was your day?” Sam asked, smirking.

“Shut up,” Dean said and he walked towards his bedroom, still holding Cas’ hand. He closed the door and locked it, only to turn around to see a very nervous Castiel. “Relax, I’m just gonna teach you how to human,” He paused. “since we’ve become… Intimate with each other.” He concluded, proud of his phrasing.

Cas furrowed his brow and tilted his head. “How to… human?” He asked, not understanding what Dean had meant by that.

“It’s… Never mind. Just… listen to me.” Dean said, knowing that if he tried to explain, Cas would only become more perplexed.

Cas nodded and Dean internally sighed.

“Alright. I’m gonna teach you how to do a lot of things, like laundry, hygiene, cooking, cleaning, you know, normal, human things.” Dean explained and Cas nodded in understanding. “You’re human now so… You have to know how to do certain things.”

“Yes, I understand. But, Dean, what if… What if I do everything wrong?” Cas said as he looked away sorrowfully.

“You won’t, Cas. And I’ll be right here with you.” Dean leaned in and kissed Cas’ cheek causing a small amount of blush to form on his cheeks. “Alright. How about we start with hygiene?”

Cas nodded and followed Dean into the bathroom, anxiously waiting for Dean to show him what to do. Dean smiled at Cas’ anticipation and continued to prepare the area for his lesson.

“I know that you know how to shower, so we’ll start with something else, like, brushing your teeth,” Dean suggested causing Cas to protest.

“Dean, I know how to brush my te–” Cas was interrupted.

“No, Cas, you eat the toothpaste. That’s not brushing your teeth.” Dean said with a small chuckle. He had seen Cas eat toothpaste on more than one occasion so he knew perfectly well that he had made a fair point.

Cas looked down, his mouth forming the shape of an 'o’. He sighed but reluctantly agreed, knowing that Dean was right.

Dean smiled and grabbed Cas a new toothbrush, as well as a freshly opened tube of mint flavored toothpaste. He figured he should probably demonstrate how to do it, so he grabbed his own toothbrush and planned on sharing the toothpaste with Cas.

“Okay, so you open the toothpaste and squeeze a little onto your toothbrush like this.” He squeezed a blob of toothpaste onto his toothbrush and showed Cas. “And then you run the toothbrush under the water and stick it in your mouth.” He put the toothbrush in his mouth and started brushing. “An den you bwush.” He said, but the toothbrush caused his words to slur. He pulled the toothbrush out of his mouth and spit the extra toothpaste out of his mouth while rinsing his toothbrush. “Now you try.” He put his toothbrush away and stepped away from the sink to let Cas try.

“O-okay.” He said hesitantly as he approached the sink. He grabbed the toothpaste and squeezed some onto his toothbrush, but he squeezed too much. Dean chuckled softly and let him continue, but Cas was too concentrated on the task in front of him that he didn’t notice Dean’s laughter. He put the toothbrush under the tap but let it sit there too long which caused the toothpaste to slowly drip off of the toothbrush. He turned the water off and placed the toothbrush in his mouth. He brushed his teeth for way too long and by the time he was done, there was toothpaste all over the floor and all over Cas’ face. He rinsed his toothbrush and put everything away, turning around with a smile on his face.

“I did it!” He said, proud of himself that he was one step closer to fitting in.

“Yes, you did!” Dean said, inching closer to help him clean off his face and the floor. “You did it.” He said softly, rubbing his boyfriend’s back as he gathered up supplies to clean up the mess.

Once the mess had been cleaned up, Dean decided to teach Cas everything else that night. Everything else went well. Cas hadn’t messed anything up and he was doing everything correctly. Cas had just finished vacuuming which had been the hardest thing for him to learn since he didn’t like how loud it was, and he was sitting with Dean in Dean’s room watching Netflix with him. They weren’t really watching the movie. They were just talking. They were listening to each other’s voices and enjoying their time together.

All of a sudden, Cas stood up and grabbed Dean’s hand, bringing him with him. Cas went to the garage and shoved dean into the driver’s seat of his car.

“Where are we going?” Dean asked completely and utterly confused as to why Cas wanted him in the car.

“Just drive,” Cas said and Dean nodded slowly as he started the car.

Dean pulled out of the garage and headed in a random direction.

-

A little while later, Cas spotted a clearing in the road that led to a small pathway between the pine trees. “Pull over.” He said, causing a déjà vu moment to pass through Dean’s mind.

Dean pulled over and turned the car off as he looked over at Cas who was opening the car door to get out. Dean got out too and walked over to Cas. He was heading to the back off the car to sit on it. He sat down and patted the empty spot beside him for Dean to sit there. Dean complied and sat down, their thighs touching because of how close they were. Dean rested his head on Cas’ shoulder as Cas looked up at the sky.

“They’re beautiful.” He said as he looked at the stars.

“What is?” Dean asked and Cas smiled.

“Your eyes.” He stated and Dean smiled.

“I know you weren’t talking about my eyes.” He said and Cas smiled sheepishly.

“But your eyes are beautiful too.”

“What were you really talking about?” Dean asked and Cas smiled.

“The stars, the sky,” he paused, “you.”

Dean shoved his face into Cas’ chest, clearly embarrassed, and Cas smiled. “Shut up,” Dean said as he shook his head.

Cas fixed his gaze on Dean and his smile widened. He stood up and looked at Dean who had stood up as well, probably wondering why Cas had stood up. Cas turned towards Dean and smiled.

“They remind me of you. Your soul. When I was an angel, I could look at your soul if I wanted to, and every time I did, I thought about the stars in the sky, and the joy it brings to many people. Now, I know what you’re gonna say. 'No chick flick moments’, right? But, I don’t care how cliche I sound, you are the most beautiful thing to ever exist in the universe." 

Before Dean could say anything, Cas pulled out a black box and kneeled down on one knee. He opened the box revealing an engagement ring. "Dean, when I met you, I couldn’t even describe my feelings toward you. I’ve loved you from the very beginning. I watched my father create you and the entire time I kept thinking to myself about how excited I was to meet you. As soon as I met you, I knew there was something special between us, I just couldn’t put my finger on it. I wasn’t sure what my feelings were trying to tell me, but now I know. Now I know that I want to be with you for the rest of our lives. I want to be yours, and I want you to be mine. Will you marry me?”

Dean stood in front of Castiel, with tears streaming down his cheeks. The only light that was provided was from the quickly disappearing sunset that they could faintly see. Dean couldn’t form any words, so he just nodded vigorously, a giant smile forming on his face. Cas slid the ring onto Dean’s finger and stood up, tears pouring out of his eyes too.

“Castiel Winchester. I like the sound of that.” Dean smiled. “I don’t care if you proposed to me or not, you’re taking my last name.”

Cas smiled and nodded. "I love you,“ Cas said, the lump in his throat become larger from his tears of joy.

"I love you too. I always will”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cried... so will you. Enjoy!

Dean pulled a white box out of his pocket and opened it, taking out an engagement ring that was almost identical to the one on his finger. He smiled sheepishly and looked at the ring, his heart fluttering at the thought of marrying Cas.

“Great minds think alike.” He said as he slid the ring onto Cas finger. “I’m not good with speeches.” He laughed softly and Cas smiled. “Now we can both have rings. Guess you beat me to it.”

Cas’ smile widened and he smashed his lips onto Dean’s, catching him off guard. Dean grunted from the sudden impact but he eventually melted into the kiss. They pulled away, both out of breath, and Dean’s eyes were still closed as if he was still savoring the moment. Cas smiled at his action and he kissed his nose softly. They were both happy.

Cas and Dean went back to the bunker and decided to go to bed. They would tell Sam about their engagement in the morning but at that moment they were both about to fall asleep standing. They climbed into bed and this time Cas spooned Dean, but he felt like something was missing. His wings. He wanted to wrap his wings around Dean protectively while he spooned him, but he couldn’t. He didn’t have wings anymore. At that moment he knew what he had to do.

Dean woke up and rolled over, hoping to see his beautiful blue-eyed ex-angel, but no one was there. Dean sat up, thinking nothing of it, and got up. He realized that he had fallen asleep in his outfit from the day before, so he quickly changed and headed to the library. Sam was sitting at one of the three tables on his laptop, as always, and he looked up as Dean walked in.

“Morning,” Sam said cheerily like he did every morning for the past twenty years.

“Morning,” Dean replied, his gruff voice still groggy from sleep. He knew he probably looked dead but that’s what a good sleep does to you.

“Where’s Cas?” Sam asked, secretly smiling about what Dean looked, and sounded like.

There it was. Dean felt a ping in his chest as he remembered Cas wasn’t in bed with him when he woke up. If he wasn't with Sam, then where was he? 

Dean looked at Sam with wide eyes and his mouth agape. “I don’t… I don’t know.” Dean looked away from Sam, thinking of all the places Cas could be. “He wasn't there when I woke up. I thought he was with you.”

Sam jumped up and grabbed his phone. “We have to call him. He’s human now. Who knows what he could get himself into?”

Dean nodded and grabbed Sam’s phone, clicking on the ‘call’ button.

-

Cas had been driving in a stolen Honda Civic for a few hours and he was feeling uncertain of where he was supposed to go. He left the bunker early in the morning to go find his grace. He realized that he needed to get his powers back so that he could protect his fiancé.

He felt a presence at a local park and he decided to see what it was. He parked the stolen vehicle and stepped out of the car. He walked over to a park bench and looked around. There were no children which was strange since it was a Saturday morning. He immediately knew that something was up. He slid his angel blade through his trench coat that he had recently gotten back, and he flipped the blade, looking around for an enemy.

“Castiel.” A man said causing Cas to turn around.

“Theo.” He replied, anger and determination lacing his gruff voice.

“Hello, brother,” Theo stated and Cas scoffed.

“You may be my brother, but you were never my brother,” Cas spat and Theo sighed heavily.

“Castiel…” Theo trailed off knowing that he could never persuade his brother. “I was injured in the fall. I know that we can help each other.”

Cas gave Theo a dirty look and shook his head. He advanced towards the angel with his angel blade in his hand and a strong-minded look on his face. His nostrils were flared as he positioned himself in a combative stance. “I will kill myself before I help you.”

Theo scoffed and slid his own angel blade through his sleeve. “Do it then.”

Cas pondered what he would do next, but he quickly came to a decision. “Nah, I’d rather kill you.” He was about to throw his blade into Theo’s chest when he realized something. He knew what he had to do to protect Dean.

He slashed his knife towards Theo’s throat but he dodged it causing Cas to fall forward. He caught himself before he fell but as soon as he attempted to stab Theo, more angels walked up behind him. They had smirks on their faces and their angel blade in front of them. One of the angels threw himself at Cas, but Cas didn’t have enough time to react which resulted in a large gash in his stomach. 

His phone started to ring in his pocket but he ignored it. He didn’t have time to answer his phone seeing that another angel was attempted to stab him. Cas shoved his blade through the angel’s chest and he lit up with light. He fell to the ground leaving a burnt mark of broken wings behind him.

Cas turned towards Theo, but Theo managed to swing his blade towards Cas faster than he thought he could, leaving Cas with another gash that was higher than the one before. He screamed and punched Theo hard, causing Theo to fall unconscious. He had other plans for Theo.

He threw his blade into the other angel’s chest and he turned to the last one, anger and determination showing through. He fought hand and blade with the angel until he managed to grab the angel’s blade and stab him with it. 

He collected all of the extra blades and turned to Theo, who was still motionless. He slashed the knife across Theo’s chest causing him to wake up screaming. He turned to Cas with sadness in his eyes. He knew what Cas was about to do and the only thing he could think of was to beg for forgiveness.

“Please, brother.” He said, his voice full of pain and sorrow. He knew he couldn’t avoid the inevitable, but he thought it would be better to try rather than give up.

Cas looked at him sadly, knowing that he shouldn’t have killed his brothers and sisters, but he had a mission. He had a purpose. He needed to protect Dean. “I’m sorry, brother.” He slit Theo’s throat and inhaled his grace before stabbing him with one of the four blades he had received. He lit up with light, showing his broken wings, and left the bodies for the police to deal with. His wounds had healed themselves as he lit up with light, but he didn’t worry about any of that. He had somewhere he needed to be.

-

Dean groaned when his call went to voicemail once again. He had called Cas many times and every time it went to voicemail. He threw his phone back on the table and looked at Sam worriedly. Sam had been tracking Cas’ phone for a while but they still couldn’t find Cas. The only thing they knew was that he wasn’t too far away. 

“Where the hell are you, Cas?” He asked as he stood up to go check on what Sam had found. “What'd ya got?” He asked Sam but Sam shook his head.

“Nada. I don’t know where he is, Dean.” Sam said sorrowfully and Dean inhaled deeply.

Alright. We’ll find him. But at the moment, I’m letting you know.“ Dean said while staring at Sam deeply.

"Letting me know what?” Sam asked and Dean sighed.

“I’m letting you know.” He said slowly, trying to hint something. 

Sam’s eyes flashed blue telling Dean that Ezekiel was there. He looked at Dean who looked broken. “What is it, Dean?”

“We can’t find Cas.” He said sadly, tears threatening to spill out of his eyes. “We need help.”

Ezekiel nodded, knowing what he was going through, but he shook his head almost immediately after. “I know how you feel, but I am no use. He’s warded against angels. I can do nothing to help.” He said sadly and Dean nodded.

“Okay. Okay.” He tried to control himself but the tears fell anyway. “I understand.” He said, his voice cracking slightly from his tears. “You can go. We’ll find him.”

Ezekiel left and Sam was back, causing Dean to take a deep breath and try to hide his tears. “We’ll find him.” He repeated softly and Sam nodded.

“Call him again.”

Dean didn’t hesitate as he pressed the 'call’ button. His heart leaped as he heard the click on the other end, indicating that someone had picked up.

-

Cas got in the stolen Honda Civic and started driving back to the bunker. He needed to be with Dean, even if he knew that this choice was eventually going to kick his ass.

He had been driving for about ten minutes when his phone started to ring. He picked up and smiled when he heard Dean’s voice.

“Cas, baby, where the hell are you?” Dean yelled but he wasn’t angry. He was relieved.

“I’m on my way back to the bunker now. I’ll tell you when I get there.” Cas replied and he heard Dean sigh, unquestionably relieved that Cas wasn’t dead.

“Alright. We were worried about you, baby.” Dean said and Cas sighed wistfully.

“I know, but you’ll understand why I did what I did. It’s only a matter of time.” Cas said, happy that he could talk to his fiancé.

“Just get here as soon as you can,” Dean said, worried about his fiancé

“Of course.” Cas hung up and smiled. He only wanted to see his fiancé. He was smiling until he was reminded of what he did. He stole another angel’s grace to save Dean. He thought it was the right thing to do, but he wasn’t sure how Dean would feel about it. Cas had killed for Dean. 

His smile turned into a frown as he saw the bunker quickly approach. He parked his stolen car on the side of the road and stepped out. He walked over to the large metal door and took a deep breath. He knocked on the door and he heard Dean’s heavy footsteps walk up the stairs. He tried not to be a pessimist, but he knew that Dean’s reaction wouldn’t be sufficient.

Dean’s face appeared as the door opened and he ran into Cas’ arms. Cas winced from the sudden contact but he eventually hugged back. Dean pulled away and saw the blood on his shirt. His eyes widened as he looked at Cas who sighed.

“It’s a long story.”

Dean nodded and brought Cas inside with him. He ignored Sam’s protests as he led Cas to their shared bedroom. He closed the door and sat on the bed beside Cas. 

“What happened?” He asked and Cas sighed.

Now or never.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feels! :') Smut! Enjoy!

Cas took a deep breath and began the short version of his story. “I got my grace back. Well, not my grace per se, but it should work for as long as I need it to.“

"What do you mean?” Dean asked, confused as to what he meant by getting his grace back.

“I stole another angels grace, and then I killed him,” Cas said and Dean looked at him with wide eyes.

“Okay then. You know, I missed you, a lot.” Dean said with a small smirk, causing Cas’ eyes to widen. “I wanted to do this differently,” Dean said seductively as his eyes flicked from Cas’ eyes to his lips and then back up again.

“Okay…” Cas said, letting Dean know that he could continue. He was slightly nervous about what Dean had in mind but he knew that Dean would never hurt him.

“How about I just demonstrate?” Dean asked already ripping his clothes off.

Cas nodded and started pulling his own clothes off. As soon as they were in their boxers, they ripped each other’s off and Dean smiled, seeing that he had caused Cas’ erection. He looked at Cas and gave him a comforting smile.

“Are you ready?” He asked and Cas nodded, now eager to find out what Dean wanted to do differently.

Dean laid on top of Cas in the opposite direction, both laying in the ‘69’ position. He put his length in Cas’ mouth as he positioned his face in front of Cas’ length. He wrapped his lips around the tip and sucked it, earning a groan from Cas who had been sucking on Dean’s cock. Dean groaned from the vibration on his sensitive erection, causing the same reaction from Cas. It kept going back and forth as their groans intensified.

Dean let out a particularly loud groan, indicating that he was close, and Cas smirked as he flipped Dean onto his back. Cas was now on top of Dean, still sucking his cock, but Dean was shocked by his actions. Dean was pretty close but he wasn’t sure how long it would be. He just continued to suck on Cas.

Cas sucked Dean as hard as he could causing Dean’s orgasm to come out of nowhere.

“Oh, fuck!” Dean yelled as his load shot into Cas’ mouth.

Watching Dean come undone caused Cas’ orgasm to smash through him. They came in each other’s mouths and rolled off of each other. They got in between the sheets to cover their naked bodies as they came down from their highs.

“Bet your 'brothers and sisters’ don’t know how good you are in bed.” Dean teased and Cas rolled his eyes. “I’m not lying.”

“What about you? I bet all those girls you slept with don’t know that you’re better at sex with me. And I’m not female.” Cas said with a small smile, knowing that he won.

“Touche.” Dean chuckled softly.

Cas smiled, but it was soon replaced with pain as angel radio overwhelmed him. He listened to what the angels had to say and his eyes widened. he sat straight up and put his fingertips on his temples. He looked at Dean and smiled.

Dean sat up and looked at him with worry and confusion. He held his head in his hands. “What is it?” He asked, worried about his fiance.

“The angels were told that another angel inserted his grace through intercourse,” Cas said and Dean furrowed his eyebrows. “That was me. I still have some of my grace. It wasn’t Theo’s grace, it was mine.”

“What does that mean?” Dean asked, not understanding what the point of it was.

“I’ve claimed you as mine, Dean. You are my mate.”

“What?” Dean was shocked but happy.

“When an angel inserts his grace into someone, it is unintentional, but it means that that person was always their mate. They just needed time to realize that.” Cas explained and Dean’s eyes widened.

“We’re mates?” Dean asked and Cas nodded.

“Yes. Even if we cannot create offspring. Now, can you see my wings?” If Dean could see his wings, then that would mean that they were soulmates.

Dean hadn’t noticed before, but behind Cas, there were large black but broken wings. He felt bad that Cas’ wings were so damaged, but he nodded anyway. “Y-yes.”

Cas smiled and smashed his lips onto Dean’s causing them both to fall back onto the bed, Cas on top of Dean. They made out for a while until they were both out of breath.

Dean stood up and put Cas’ shirt on with his own boxers and he pulled Cas with him, making him wear his shirt with his own boxers. Dean dragged Cas out of their bedroom, and as soon as they stepped into the library Dean lifted their hands up with a large smile.

“Cas is my soulmate!” He exclaimed, causing Sam to stand up and look at Cas for approval.

Cas nodded, his own smile making its way onto his face.

“Wait, seriously?” Sam asked and both Cas and Dean nodded vigorously. “How do you know?”

“The angels explained the situation through angel radio, and Dean can see my wings,” Cas told Sam who furrowed his eyebrows.

“I thought you were human now.”

“Well, I was, but I stole another angel’s grace, and I still have some of my own grace so I have wings. They’re just… Broken.” Cas paused. “If an angel inserts his grace into someone they love, through intercourse, it is unintentional but it means they’re mates. If a human can see an angel’s wings, that means that they are soulmates.” Cas explained and Sam’s eyes widened.

“You’re mates and soulmates? But aren’t they the same thing?” Sam asked and Cas shook his head.

“Not really,” Cas said and Sam shrugged.

“Well, that’s great! Congratulations!” Sam said and Dean chuckled.

“We would’ve gotten married anyway, even if we weren’t soulmates. Or mates.” Dean said, smiling widely to see if Sam noticed what he had said.

Sam nodded, not really paying attention but as soon as he realized what Dean said his eyes snapped open. “What?”

Both Cas and Dean lifted their left hands to show the engagement rings. Dean was grinning like an idiot, but Cas was just smiling softly.

“You’re engaged?!” Sam asked and Cas and Dean nodded. “That’s great! Congratulations guys!” Sam exclaimed and they both chuckled. “I better be invited to your wedding.” Sam teased and Dean smiled.

“Nah. We don’t want you to come,” Dean said and Sam chuckled.

“Yeah, right.” Sam shook his head at their playfulness and patted both Dean and Cas on the back.

“Part two?” Dean asked, winking at Cas as he asked about earlier.

“Definitely.”

That night, the bunker was filled with moans and groans from both men, as Sam tried not to throw up because he knew exactly what was going on in the other room. It was a good day.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feels! :') Enjoy!

Cas took a deep breath and began the short version of his story. “I got my grace back. Well, not my grace per say, but it should work for as long as I need it to.“

"What do you mean?” Dean asked, confused as to what he meant by getting his grace back.

“I stole another angels grace, and then I killed him,” Cas said and Dean looked at him with wide eyes.

“Okay then. You know, I missed you, a lot.” Dean said with a small smirk, causing Cas’ eyes to widen. “I wanted to do this differently,” Dean said seductively as his eyes flicked from Cas’ eyes to his lips and then back up again.

“Okay…” Cas said, letting Dean know that he could continue. He was slightly nervous about what Dean had in mind but he knew that Dean would never hurt him.

“How about I just demonstrate?” Dean asked already ripping his clothes off.

Cas nodded and started pulling his own clothes off. As soon as they were in their boxers, they ripped each other’s off and Dean smiled, seeing that he had caused Cas’ erection. He looked at Cas and gave him a comforting smile.

“Are you ready?” He asked and Cas nodded, now eager to find out what Dean wanted to do differently.

Dean laid on top of Cas in the opposite direction, both laying in the ‘69’ position. He put his length in Cas’ mouth as he positioned his face in front of Cas’ length. He wrapped his lips around the tip and sucked it, earning a groan from Cas who had been sucking on Dean’s cock. Dean groaned from the vibration on his sensitive erection, causing the same reaction from Cas. It kept going back and forth as their groans intensified.

Dean let out a particularly loud groan, indicating that he was close, and Cas smirked as he flipped Dean onto his back. Cas was now on top of Dean, still sucking his cock, but Dean was shocked by his actions. Dean was pretty close but he wasn’t sure how long it would be. He just continued to suck on Cas.

Cas sucked Dean as hard as he could causing Dean’s orgasm to come out of nowhere.

“Oh, fuck!” Dean yelled as his load shot into Cas’ mouth.

Watching Dean come undone caused Cas’ orgasm to smash through him. They came in each other’s mouths and rolled off of each other. They got in between the sheets to cover their naked bodies as they came down from their highs.

“Bet your 'brothers and sisters’ don’t know how good you are in bed.” Dean teased and Cas rolled his eyes. “I’m not lying.”

“What about you? I bet all those girls you slept with don’t know that you’re better at sex with me. And I’m not female.” Cas said with a small smile, knowing that he won.

“Touche.” Dean chuckled softly.

Cas smiled, but it was soon replaced with pain as angel radio overwhelmed him. He listened to what the angels had to say and his eyes widened. he sat straight up and put his fingertips on his temples. He looked at Dean and smiled.

Dean sat up and looked at him with worry and confusion. He held his head in his hands. “What is it?” He asked, worried about his fiance.

“The angels were told that another angel inserted his grace through intercourse,” Cas said and Dean furrowed his eyebrows. “That was me. I still have some of my grace. It wasn’t Theo’s grace, it was mine.”

“What does that mean?” Dean asked, not understanding what the point of it was.

“I’ve claimed you as mine, Dean. You are my mate.”

“What?” Dean was shocked but happy.

“When an angel inserts his grace into someone, it is unintentional, but it means that that person was always their mate. They just needed time to realize that.” Cas explained and Dean’s eyes widened.

“We’re mates?” Dean asked and Cas nodded.

“Yes. Even if we cannot create offspring. Now, can you see my wings?” If Dean could see his wings, then that would mean that they were soulmates.

Dean hadn’t noticed before, but behind Cas, there were large black but broken wings. He felt bad that Cas’ wings were so damaged, but he nodded anyway. “Y-yes.”

Cas smiled and smashed his lips onto Dean’s causing them both to fall back onto the bed, Cas on top of Dean. They made out for a while until they were both out of breath.

Dean stood up and put Cas’ shirt on with his own boxers and he pulled Cas with him, making him wear his shirt with his own boxers. Dean dragged Cas out of their bedroom, and as soon as they stepped into the library Dean lifted their hands up with a large smile.

“Cas is my soulmate!” He exclaimed, causing Sam to stand up and look at Cas for approval.

Cas nodded, his own smile making its way onto his face.

“Wait, seriously?” Sam asked and both Cas and Dean nodded vigorously. “How do you know?”

“The angels explained the situation through angel radio, and Dean can see my wings,” Cas told Sam who furrowed his eyebrows.

“I thought you were human now.”

“Well, I was, but I stole another angel’s grace, and I still have some of my own grace so I have wings. They’re just… Broken.” Cas paused. “If an angel inserts his grace into someone they love, through intercourse, it is unintentional but it means they’re mates. If a human can see an angel’s wings, that means that they are soulmates.” Cas explained and Sam’s eyes widened.

“You’re mates and soulmates? But aren’t they the same thing?” Sam asked and Cas shook his head.

“Not really,” Cas said and Sam shrugged.

“Well, that’s great! Congratulations!” Sam said and Dean chuckled.

“We would’ve gotten married anyway, even if we weren’t soulmates. Or mates.” Dean said, smiling widely to see if Sam noticed what he had said.

Sam nodded, not really paying attention but as soon as he realized what Dean said his eyes snapped open. “What?”

Both Cas and Dean lifted their left hands to show the engagement rings. Dean was grinning like an idiot, but Cas was just smiling softly.

“You’re engaged?!” Sam asked and Cas and Dean nodded. “That’s great! Congratulations guys!” Sam exclaimed and they both chuckled. “I better be invited to your wedding.” Sam teased and Dean smiled.

“Nah. We don’t want you to come,” Dean said and Sam chuckled.

“Yeah, right.” Sam shook his head at their playfulness and patted both Dean and Cas on the back.

“Part two?” Dean asked, winking at Cas as he asked about earlier.

“Definitely.”

That night, the bunker was filled with moans and groans from both men, as Sam tried not to throw up because he knew exactly what was going on in the other room. It was a good day.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tears with this one too. Enjoy!

Dean opened the door to the bunker and stepped in, holding the door open for Sam to enter as well. He walked down the stairs and set the beer on the table.

“Cas?” He called out as he turned around and looked for his fiance. “Cas, baby?” He was nowhere. Dean thought that maybe he went to get some fresh air and he would be back, but he never did that. 

Dean took a step forward and looked around with his gun in his hand. He looked down and saw blood on the floor which caused his heart to clench. He took another step and peeked into the library, hoping to see Cas there, asleep maybe, not dead. But, he wasn’t there.

“Dean? What is it?” Sam came up from behind and Dean pointed to the blood that was on the floor. “Whose is it?" 

"I don’t know, Cas’?” He said and Sam got his gun out. They walked in different directions, planning to look for Cas in every corner of the bunker.

-

As soon as every corner was searched in, Sam and Dean went back to the library to look for clues as to where Cas went. They looked around and found an angel blade under the table.

“Must be Cas’ too. Unless there were other angels here.” Sam said and a light bulb went off in Dean’s mind. His eyes widened and he frantically began throwing weapons and holy oil in his duffle bag. “Dean? What are you doing?” Sam asked, confused as to why Dean looked like a chicken with its head cut off.

Dean took and deep breath but it didn’t seem to help. He began to hyperventilate as he thought about what had happened earlier that day. “Cas said that when he tuned into angel radio, an angel said they were gonna hunt him down and kill him for his sins,” Dean said in between breaths.

Sam looked away as he processed the information. As soon as he realized what Dean was saying, his eyes widened also. “Angels took him?”

“Y-yes,” Dean said shakily. He hated the thought of angels hurting his fiance. It was horrible and he just wanted it to stop, but it never did. Little did he know, Cas had the same feelings that Dean had, but Cas was sure that Dean wouldn't care if he died. Cas was sure that Dean didn’t want him anymore, that he never loved him. He wasn’t ready to say ‘goodbye’.

-

Cas woke up with handcuffs around his wrists. He was standing up because the handcuffs were connected to the ceiling, but they were angel proof. He couldn’t escape unless he had the key. But, he knew he would never get his hands on the key.

His trench coat was gone, as well as his suit jacket and tie, which left him in his white button up shirt and his black slacks. His wrists were raw from the handcuffs rubbing at his skin and his face was swollen and bloody from the angel beating him. But, he wouldn't blame the angel. It was his own fault. He didn’t fight back, nor attempt to protect himself. Dean didn't love him, so there was no point.

Dean was probably happy that he was missing. Or, Dean hadn’t even realized, because he never paid attention to him anyway. Whatever he was doing, it didn’t matter to Castiel anymore, because he knew that he would never be saved. Definitely not by Dean. Dean didn’t care about him. He never did.

Footsteps approached and the door opened as the angel who beat up Cas, walked into the room. He looked proud of his accomplishment, but he shouldn’t have. It was his brother. He smirked at Cas as he walked closer, enjoying how he looked completely worthless, once again.

“Goodmorning, Castiel.” The angel snickered as he made fun of the other angel’s name.

“Samael. You and I both know that this isn’t going to work.” Cas said and the angel scoffed.

“Would you look at that? He knows my name!” He said sarcastically. “Lemme guess. You know what it means to?”

“You’re a lecher, a criminal, and a killer. I don’t even know why God created you.” Cas spat and Samael inhaled sharply.

“Ooh. That’s cold, Castiel.” Samael smirked again as he turned around, pondering on what to do with Cas.

“You are exactly like Lucifer. Hated. Feared. Rejected by God himself. But, instead of throwing you in the cage, he tried removing you. He tried to fix the mistake he knew he had made by eliminating you from the universe. At least I wasn’t a mistake.” Cas’ nostrils were flared as he spoke about his fallen brother.

Samael was fuming as he listened to Cas. His breathing became ragged and his lip was curled up, showing his gritted teeth. His anger was overwhelming his pride. “Castiel. You better shut your mouth, or I will kill you.”

“Do it.” Cas challenged as he leaned forward slightly, looking through his long, black eyelashes.

“Actually, I’m waiting for that special someone to burst in, guns blazing, ready to kill me on the spot. Then, once he’s here, I’ll kill you.” Samael paused as he fixed his gaze on a fulfilled Castiel. That’s all he wanted.

At this point, Cas had leaned back, still standing, as he thought about what Samael said. He was going to kill him right in front of Dean, and then he was going to kill Dean. Cas looked at Samael with a sad expression on his face. “Dean isn’t going to care. He doesn’t love me.”

“Oh, but he will. Once he sees what I’ve done to you.” Samael turned back around to face Cas as he slid his angel blade through his sleeve and into his hand. “Once he sees you all bloody and begging for mercy, he’ll want to save you. He’ll want to run over and hold you in his arms. His poor, poor fiance. But, before he gets there, I’m going to kill you, right in front of him. And then, I’m going to kill him.”

Cas looked away and sighed. If only his brother would shut up and just let him die. It’s what he wanted. “Just kill me now.” He said as he moved his wrists in the handcuffs.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Before Cas could say anything, Samael had sliced his stomach open in one swift movement.

-

Dean had torn up the bunker as he searched for Cas’ whereabouts. He looked anywhere and everywhere for clues that would tell him where Cas was and the only thing he found was an angel blade.

Sam was on his laptop searching for things, and Dean was trashing the bunker. It had been several hours since they got to work and they weren’t getting anywhere. That is until Sam stood up abruptly.

Dean looked up at Sam who had a smile on his face. “What is it?”

Sam turned his head and gestured for Dean to stand up. “I found him.” He said as soon as Dean stood up from the floor.

Dean smiled and grabbed his duffle bag. “Where to?” He asked as he turned to Sam, still beaming.

“Uhm, Chicago, kinda.” He said and Dean nodded. It was good enough for him.

Dean practically ran up the stairs as he told Sam to 'hurry up’. He hopped into the driver’s seat, and as soon as Sam got in, he put the car in drive and sped away.

-

Cas screamed in agony as Samael plunged the angel blade into his side again. It wasn’t far enough to kill him, but it hurt like hell. Cas knew better than to beg for mercy. He knew enough about Samael to know that that would never work. He didn’t want to beg anyway. There was nothing to live for anymore.

Samael laughed and flipped the bloody blade in his hand. He snickered at Cas and turned around to head to the door. Before he got there, an angel from earlier walked in.

“The Winchesters are here.” She said and Samael smirked.

He nodded and she left. He turned around to face Castiel again, with a smirk plastered across his face. “Showtime.”

-

Dean pulled up to an old, abandoned warehouse that was just outside of Chicago. It looked like it had been there for a while. They both stepped out of the car and quietly went to the trunk to grab their weapons. Dean was shaking from anxiety and fear yet Sam was calm. Sam knew that they had a chance to save him.

They both snuck towards the entrance and opened the squeaky door, hoping that nobody heard. They split up and heading in different directions, hoping to find Cas while avoiding the opponent.

Dean heard screaming and he knew it was Cas, so he sprinted in the direction of the sound. He arrived right as Sam did, and they peeked into the room. Cas was in handcuffs that were attached to the ceiling, and he was standing as a man cut him with an angel blade. The man was about to shove the blade into Cas’ chest to kill him when Dean yelled.

“HEY!” He screamed at the top of his lungs, causing the man to miss Cas’ chest and to stab him in his left side. Cas cried out as 'his’ grace seeped through the wound.

Dean leaped towards the man, whom he presumed was an angel, and pinned him to the wall.

Sam fought off the two other angels and killed them as he made his way over to Cas to get him out of the handcuffs.

“Who are you?” Dean asked as he used his entire body weight to keep him pinned down.

“No one,” Samael said with a smirk and Dean pushed him into the wall harder than before.

“I said, 'WHO ARE YOU?!’” Dean yelled as he grabbed the angel blade and cut the man’s cheekbone. He groaned and inhaled shakily.

“S-Samael. I’m an angel.” He said and Dean sighed.

“Another one of you dicks?” Dean already knew what he was. He just wanted to know his name, so that he would know the name of the angel who almost killed his angel.

Dean shoved the angel blade into Samael’s chest and he lit up with light as he screamed in agony. He fell limply to the floor with a thump and Dean exhaled deeply.

Dean swung around and ran over to Cas who was laying on the floor. Tears of joy fell and he kissed his angel’s lips, but Cas didn’t kiss him back. Dean thought nothing of it and decided that Cas was just too tired to kiss him back. 

Dean picked Cas up and ran to the car, placing him on his lap in the backseat. he tossed his keys to Sam and told him to drive to the bunker as fast as possible. Dean was trying to tend to his wounds in the car, but nothing was too serious. Cas wasn’t going to die.

“Hang in there, baby,” Dean said but Cas shook his head.

“Don’t call me that.” He said and Dean’s heart shattered. His eyebrows furrowed and his mouth opened imperceptibly.

“W-why not?” Dean asked as he looked at Cas with hurt in his eyes.

“I’ll tell you later,” Cas said, tears threatening to spill from the events, as well as what Samael had said.

Dean nodded and leaned back as he tried to relax. Why didn’t Cas want him to call him 'baby’? Did he not love him anymore? He would find out soon enough.

-

As soon as they made it to the bunker, Dean helped Cas inside as Sam grabbed their belongings. Dean led Cas into their shared bedroom and closed the door. He sat on the bed beside Cas and looked at him with worry in his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” He asked and Cas shook his head. He refused to tell Dean what was wrong. He was only going to tell him something he apprehended as he was being tortured by Samael.

“N-nothing. It’s just… I realized something.” Cas looked away. It hurt him to have to tell Dean, but it needed to be done.

“W-what?” Dean asked, his nerves getting the best of him.

“We can’t be together.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the final chapter of this series. Enjoy!

“W-what? Why can’t we be together?” Dean looked deep into Cas’ eyes and they were full of pain and sorrow.

“Did you know I was missing?” Cas asked, wanting answers before he answered Dean’s question. He needed to know a few things before he flat-out told Dean why they couldn’t be together.

“Yeah,” Dean said, becoming worried as to why Cas didn't answer his question. He couldn’t think of any reason other than Cas didn't love him anymore, and that was too deplorable to think about.

“How long did it take you to know I was gone?” Cas asked, becoming more specific with his questions as he examined the entire situation, in his mind.

“Well, I walked in after the hunt and you weren’t answering me so I went looking. It didn’t even take me thirty seconds to know that something was up.” Dean explained, his nervousness growing as Cas got closer and closer to answering his question.

Cas nodded as he looked away, deep in thought. Did Dean love him? He wasn't sure, because it seemed apparent a few hours prior that he didn't love him, but in those moments, it seemed as if Dean loved him with all of his heart.

“Why can’t we be together?” Dean asked, too impatient to wait for Cas to answer it on his own time. He wanted to know why Cas thought that they couldn’t be together. They both loved each other, didn’t they?

Cas thought about the question before taking a deep breath. “I can’t put you in danger anymore.”

“What do you mean?” Dean asked, utterly confused as to what Cas meant. What danger?

“The angels want me, and they want me bad. They’ll take me and wait to kill me, assuming that you’ll come save me. They’ll kill me and then they’ll kill you. Like they almost did.” Cas said and Dean sighed.

“We’re always at risk, Cas.” Dean tried to convince Cas but he wasn’t going to budge.

“You’re more at risk with me here. That's why we can’t be together. Because I need to leave and never come back.” Cas said and Dean’s heart shattered. No, his soul shattered.

“N-no, Cas. I’m not gonna let you leave.” Dean said softly, not wanting to anger Cas, just wanting to let him know that that would never happen.

“Yes, you are,” Cas said as he stood up and made his way towards the door.

“No!” Dean yelled and Cas swung around with an angry look on his face. Dean couldn’t hold him back. Not this time.

“Dean,” Cas warned but Dean ignored it.

“No, Cas. Just because you think I’m ‘in danger’ and that you’re putting us at risk, doesn’t mean that I’m just gonna let you walk out on us. We need you. I need you. I love you.” Dean had tears in his eyes as he spoke.

The last three words struck Cas like an arrow to the heart. Dean loved him. Cas had heard him say it before, many times, but nothing so… Desperate. He lifted his eyes toward Dean slowly, only to see his lip pouting and tears streaming down his face. “D-Dean…”

Dean looked away and sagged his shoulders. He lost and he knew it. Cas was going to leave him and never come back. “J-just, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.” He said quietly, almost inaudibly, but Cas heard him.

Before he could say anything, a pair of strong, muscular arms wrapped around his torso. The recognizable scent of honey, vanilla, and cinnamon intoxicated him and his looked up from the ground to see a pair of bright blue eyes staring back at him.

“Dean, I’m not going to leave. You’re my fian- husband. Yes, husband. And, I love you. I always will.” Cas kissed Dean’s forehead and relaxed.

“Cas, we’re not married yet.” Dean chuckled softly and Cas shrugged.

“I know, but it takes too long. Can’t we just say we’re married? We both have rings on.” Cas whined and Dean smiled and nodded.

“Whatever you want, baby. Oh wait, you don’t want me to call you that anymore.” Dean teased and Cas blushed and looked away. “What should I call you, Mr. Bad-at-being-human?”

“Dean.” Cas whined, dragging out the 'e’ and the 'n’.

“Alright alright. I’m sorry.” Dean smiled and kissed Cas’ temple. “Castiel Winchester.”

“I like Dean Novak better.” Cas joked and Dean gave him a murderous look.

“No, no, no, no, no. No way in hell am I taking that last name.” Dean said, completely serious about it.

“Okay. You can keep your last name.” Cas smiled at Dean’s scowl and sighed deeply. He would stay with Dean forever.

-

One year later

“Here’s to Castiel Winchester!” Dean exclaimed as everyone rose their drinks in the air. A harmony of glass softly touching glass echoed through the forest as people toasted about Dean and Castiel’s marriage. 

Cas leaned in and pressed his lips to Dean’s happily. He finally had what he wanted. A marriage with the hunter he had fallen in love with so many years ago. A marriage with the hunter he had saved from hell. A marriage with the hunter he had fallen from heaven to save. He could finally call himself a husband, and Dean a husband. He was happy and they were safe, as long as they were in each other’s arms, every single night. And they were, ecstatic that they could spend the next day with one another. They loved each other, and they always would.


End file.
